Taylor surprised me this week by informing me one day in advance that her Reflections awards ceremony at school was Wednesday night. Sandi worked at the restaurant and couldn't get away. I could feel the excitement about her all the way after school, through eating dinner and arriving at school. As usual we were of the first one's there. She was excited to see a table full of beautiful trophies and ribbons. This was a special night for her and there was no doubt her hopes were high.
I wandered around the pictures and photos and other categories amazed at the qualities of first through fifth graders artistic abilities. It was clear to see that Taylor L. had put a lot of work into her picture. Not so much the quality but the theme. I picked up on that right away.
She has a tendency to lean towards the Sciences more that the Arts. She asked if she could sit next to her best friend and I agreed to her request. It was fun to look back one row and see the utter excitement in her and her friends. She had felt a taste for trophies when she got hers for straight "A's". This was something that she worked hard for. After much fanfare, each student methodically marched up and received a ribbon for participation. (that didn't happen when I was a child). Next they went through each category, art, photography etc., and called each student up third place, second place and then first, with a few Honorable mentions.
Most of the 45 minutes was spent thanking the people responsible for setting up the show and their efforts. It was no surprise that most of the Faculty, PTA and organizers children received trophies. One by one the winners were called. Each time, applause. Each time I looked back to see my daughter seem more and more tense at each time her name wasn't called. None of her friends received a Trophy. Her best friend received an Honorable mention. As the last trophy was presented I could see the heartbreak in her eyes. Little was said, most of the parents walked out with there children. Taylor L walked quietly and climbed into the car and fastened her seatbelt. It was then she looked at me and said with great disquietude, "Dad, I really thought I was going to get a trophy tonight"; she said, My heart sank.
Having dealt with this kind of disappointment often in my own childhood, I went into "Dad" mode and plowed into one of my motivational speeches. I told my daughter that it wasn't what you did in life that mattered so much, but who you were in life that mattered.
I told her that actions spoke louder than words. I told her that while playing Highschool and College football, that I had worked hard to be special and although there were few write ups in the local or school papers, that when "Dad" ran onto the football field, the other team was noticeably looking for my number. I had gained a reputation for hitting and tackling in the AAA division in Southern Nevada that other teams players would stay away from my side of the field as they knew if I hit them chances were they would be knocked out of the game and often times that is just what happened. I told her that when I wrestled, both teams sat across from one another by weight division on opposite sides of the mat. That Dad would from the minute we walked out and sat down, would stare non-stop at my opponent until our match. It was my way of getting inside of their heads.. Probably the reason I took State several times. It was about my actions, not words.
I told her I never put my own awards on display, as I knew who and what I was. I didn't need a slap on the back. I didn't need anyone to tell me I was good. That that was what probably made me very popular in school.
She seemed to take it hard, but understand. She was quiet the rest of the night.
Without notification, she surprised us with Family Home evening tonight. She was prepared, spiritual and confident. She could have taught Valiant 11 in Sunday School with the lesson. My Daddy daughter talk seemed to have made sense to her. She knows shes someone special in this world and not a minute goes by that dad doesn't let her know...
God Bless
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